The Booze Budget

I'm back in Bangkok and journalling like a maniac. It's been a crazy few days and experiences like the ones I'm having certainly have the effect of inspiring me. I've been on an emotional rollercoaster ride. In one moment I'm surfing a wave of elation and excitement and in the next I'm diving into barely subdued panic and floundering around gulping for air as I wrestle for control over my situation in a city where mad things will inevitably happen to you. The only way to avoid the mad things is to hide in your hotel room, which I've been tempted to do a couple of times!

Now that my journal no longer revolves entirely around what I'm "feeling", which I'm sure no-one is all that interested in, it seems appropriate to share with you some of things I've written in my journal over the last few days.

Saturday 3rd December 2005
Location: Phra Sumane Park, Bangkok

Fuck, it's hot! [inspired stuff, eh? Ed.] The air-conditioned coolness of my hotel room tempts and it's probably advisable for me to head indoors in a bit given the slow process of acclimatisation that needs to take place over the next few days. I'm tired too, I can feel it somewhere beneath the strange, sniffling (I've got a cold), adrenaline induced wave that I'm currently riding.

I had a great massage earlier. It's been on my mind for months to get a green curry and a massage as soon as I arrived in Bangkok but by the time I checked into the D&D on the Khao San Road last night it was 1am and I couldn't find either. So it was my first priority this morning to get a massage and I'm planning to eat a green curry later. I love it when a plan comes together! I don't want to go into too much detail but I will say that the massage was quite bloody rough at times (kind of a pleasure/pain thing) and served to show me how stiff I am.

Tense? Yes, I suppose so, there have been numerous occasions over the last few weeks when I've demonstrated how wound up I've become, most notably at Ben's birthday party at Lady Lux last week, when it took me five hours, copious amounts of alcohol, a party drug, fresh air, a guarana containing enery drink and half a spliff to finally unwind and become a normal, sociable human being.

Okay, the sun has all of a sudden really got it's bloody hat on so it's time for me to retreat to the shade and do some sums - twelve hours into my trip and already it's looking like my budget of a thousand baht a day is totally unrealistic.

...

Sums done I've come to the conclusion that I can't really describe myself as a "budget traveller" and as such my 1000 baht (14 GBP, 32 AUD) budget suddenly seems quite laughable. It's amazing how many memories about my last trip around Asia have come flooding back since I arrived in Bangkok. The sights, the sounds and particularly the smells have been stimulating all kinds of interesting reveries, particularly the fact that I splashed a hell of a lot of cash around the continent the last time around. Most of the time I just spent without a care, catching the occasional bus and having the occasional night off the sauce to salve my hedonistic conscience. I suspect I had a budget of 1000 baht a day for living expenses and a booze budget of something similar and it's the weekend and I must confess I'm starting to think in terms of alcohol and drunkeness.

I think I believed I'd be a little bit more mature about it all on this trip, that I'd be able to exhibit a bit more self-control. Who was I kidding? If the last three months is anything to go by then my booze budget may have to be twice the size it was before, which, amusingly, would reduce the length of the trip approximately threefold, bringing it's total length in at just over six weeks. Hell, I might even be home for Christmas!

Bugger! The 1000 pound cushion I had tucked away to soften my return to the harsh reality of Britain has just disappeared in one fal swoop! I've just spent it all in my head - on booze! Brilliant! What are you like, Ollie?

I need to dig up some more travelling funds from somewhere. Aussie superannuation? British tax return? Sell my passport? A fourth alternative occurs to me: I could find an amenable Israeli traveller and pump them for budgeting tips.

There's more amusing stories of financial abandon to come in the next installment of my travelling tales, which is provisionally titled "The Great Voglee Suit Scam". I think its going to be an instant classic.